Journey to the center of...the center.

"Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle. Don’t burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don’t quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy Christians; be inventive in hospitality." - Romans 12:9-13

It seems like common sense, right? Be a good person, do things for others...and everything will be cheerfully wonderful, right? Of course--that's the way I've always lived my life.

And that's why we're here. I've always been a communicator, someone desperately eager to share the random musings of my mind with whatever medium will listen--a sheet of paper, a human ear--because surely everyone wants to hear wonderful, happy entertaining banter, right?

It wasn't until a recent personal experience made me realize that our propensity to inspire others through our voice and be exactly what we are called to be in Paul's letter in Romans 12 is so beaten and diminished when we feel less than our best, or our self esteem takes a hit, or we just feel unloved.  We revert into our quiet places, because we think that our shame resounds louder as a flaw.  That experience, truthfully, has challenged notions and securities and traits in me that I never have had to wrestle with before--or have had the courage to. And it's been extremely uncomfortable at times.

My favorite magnet on the fridge :)

Emerging better is a constant process, but I'm getting to a place where I understand that we are called to be everything that has been laid out for us in that passage--even more so in our personal struggles, because it is then that others are able to see the redeeming grace, providence, and mercy that has been placed in us--things that we aren't capable of authoring ourselves.  In essence, sometimes people need to see the broken, raw, muddied versions of who we can be--so that our eventual renewed, beautiful selves that emerge are even more awe-inspiring and a testimony to Who we really belong to.

I've challenged myself to put aside the complexities of over analyzing myself, yet striving to live a 'self-centered' life--one that is truly focused on loving and doing and being from the center of who I am--that very place in our lives where God resides and where our faith, peace, and hope eternally remain.  It's easier to forget that place is there--and sometimes, even harder to find it when times get rough.

So I invite you to follow me on this honest journey--now, this isn't about to be some Dr. Phil revelation, and I fully expect this to be more entertaining than anything--but I hope that the decision to let people into a more intimate side of who I am helps others to find their honesty, too. :)